I think I'm just going to finally accept the fact that, to the internet, I have now become like...that father who shows up every now and then, makes you think I'm finally gonna be a part of your life again, gets really drunk, and then leaves for months without a word.
GUESS WHICH PART OF THE CYCLE THIS IS.
Actually no, it's NOT the "gets really drunk" part. That's supposed to come AFTER graduation.
Because OH RIGHT, I'M GRADUATING.
I also finally, FINALLY, managed to qualify for the tuition waver AIMS scholarship thing. THAT MEANS I GET TO KEEP (some of) MY MONEY.
So during the ceremony, we're supposed to be completely stoic and stonefaced the whole time in our seats. So when the camera pans down over my row I'ma be all like
I FEEL NOTHING
I'm also getting this strange feeling that I'm going to totally CRASH AND BURN while crossing the stage tonight.
Because, see, I've been absurdly lucky all year, so it would make sense that the universe would restore balance in such a way. So if it DOES happen, I'm just gonna play it off like it was some kind of farewell joke. So yes, you're allowed to laugh.
And right before the end, we're supposed to do some kind of...flash mob? Which apparently has nothing to do with flashing people. It's dancing.
Sorry.
But GOD DAMNIT I SUCK AT DANCING. So while everyone else is looking all pro I'm gonna be that one kid going like
And that's my BEST move. I'm worried they're going to call an ambulance because they'll mistake my epic dancing for a grand mal seizure.
But then I'll be done! FINALLY FOREVER, I will never again have to set foot in that kind of environment again. I FEEL LIKE I JUST GOT OUT OF PURGATORY. This isn't just a level up! I'M FREAKIN EVOLVING.
So I guess I'll leave it at that. I'm not making any promises to keep up with this blog, though. Remember, the next phase of this continuing analogy is "get really drunk". SO UNTIL NEXT TIME, WHENEVER THAT MAY BE--!
P.S. I'm not.. actually going to get really drunk after graduation. That...that was a joke. OBVIOUSLY you have to have a bitchin PARTY before you get smashed. DUH.
